Archive for December, 2011

The end is nigh.


Yeah, no.

In a recent series of questions, I was asked, “If you could relive one year of your life, which would it be?” Not change, but relive.

I had it down to two almost immediately — 2009 or, well, this year.

Basic process of thought:
1) I don’t think I could stand reliving a year in ignorance of the things I know now about the world, so… anything before freshman year of high school was out. Maybe even freshman year.
2) It definitely wasn’t going to be 2007 or 2008.
3) Half of 2010 sucked.

So… 2009 and 2011. I ended up choosing 2009 because it was the last year that my family was all together (however chaotic the reality of that was), but really, I think they’re tied in my mind.

And that’s good, right? That I would consider this year one of the best years of my twenty year long life thus far. It’s definitely been the year where I’ve grown the most. I could definitely punch 2010 me. Even early 2011 me. I was so punchable. But I may even be satisfied with the person I am right now. Look at that.

At the end of every year, I start thinking about where I am in “the cycle”, attempting to predict whether the next year will be good or bad. Now realizing how incredibly stupid that sounds, I’m convicted to make 2012 amazing. Awesome. Glorious!

Because looking back on a year ago, things just keep getting better.


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A series of fortunate events.

The general cycle of my life comes in two simple categories. If you’ve read any good amount of my blog, you’ve probably noticed them: upswings and downswings. Similarly, if you’ve been reading, you might know that I tend to only realize I’m in an upswing at the very peak of it.

Here’s where my life at present takes a very significant turn: I sense an upswing coming on.

Yes, that means I’m in a downswing right now. I won’t go into detail, but you, my dear readers, are more than welcome to ask me personally. I won’t depress you with stories that aren’t the focus of this post.

Because the point of all of this is that while I usually have a hard time seeing that things will be alright, this time is… different. There’s no false sense of hope, no lingering doubt, no lump of hesitation, just… joy.

‘Tis the season, right?

No, I won’t paint a picture perfect, overly idealistic future.

But I think I’m learning (again) that through all of the mistakes, the wrongs, the ugly, the broken, the lies, the hurt, the just plain crappy — joy can be born from the grace that we are granted for our faults.

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Make it rain.

I realized about thirty seconds ago how deeply I’ve been attaching money to the idea of being happy.

I want to go ___________ with my friends.

I used to be pretty good at this stuff — going out and spending little to no money and keeping myself in check.

Let’s be real. It’s hard to be relatively poor and have a social life in college. People like to go out, play, eat, etc.

I’ve been doing a lot of that. ‘Twas a quarter of reckless spending, the consequences of which I will bear for a good six months afterwards.

What if I didn’t have to buy my way into quality time with others? What if I could go back to the days of “just water” and passing on the more expensive excursions?

Sure, parts of that sucked. It sucks to never have been on Space Mountain because everytime we went to Disneyland I was a kid, that stupid ride was broken. It sucks to be the person sitting there sipping on a strawberry lemonade while everyone digs into gourmet burgers. (Well, I did freeload unlimited fries rather frequently.)

But despite all of that, I got to make memories with the people I love. And that’s the important part, right? Who’s to say I can’t still manage that?

I’m not really into New Year’s resolutions or anything, but…

I think you and I both know where this is going.

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Yes, the time has come.

I once took part in a brief conversation about the advantages and disadvantages of different blogging sites. After my last post of Chris Martin’s passionately singing face, I thought, “… That was definitely a Tumblr move.” Coupled with the short blogging series I finished, I figure, “Why not?”

Allow me to compartmentalize: I will still be posting on my WordPress all of my deeper thoughts and rants. If you’ve been reading, you know that it’ll mostly be rants. And WordPress is good for that. But I’m also in need of a comedic outlet, and Tumblr is good for reblogging and finding short, random quips of whatever I’m interested in.

So you can find said Tumblr at http://angrychopsticks.tumblr.com/ and get to know the less whiny, more entertaining side of my mind for once.

Have fun, readers.

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Round 2 of listening to this song on repeat.

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A day can end in a number of ways.

Happily. Sadly. Hilariously. Bittersweet. Angrily. Confusingly. Openly. Beautifully. And sometimes, even perfectly.

But no matter what the ending was, the next chapter is always on the next page, waiting for you.

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